[it's a little funny how so much of buzen's attention goes to making sure that matsui doesn't touch blood, but when buzen is finally the one covered in his own, matsui has such a hard time coming to contact with him. when his fingers finally find buzen's sleeve - buzen will take a moment to make sure that his hand isn't bloody and when he confirms that it isn't (mostly), takes matsui's in his.
they'd gotten into such a habit of handholding, and he's not sure if it'll work to soothe matsui as much here - but he hopes he can try?]
Okay. I'm okay, Matsu. You don't need to worry so much.
[though that's probably also buzen's tendency to say things boldly, decisively. there's a slightly breathless quality the longer he speaks, as if doing so through pain, and even now the blood loss has led to him being slightly more pale....
but he's standing, so surely it's not a big deal.]
[Honestly he's still so fucking weird about blood but it really does just loop back around into this: a hesitance to touch, because he feels so strongly about spilling blood and he hates it so dearly when it comes from the ones he cherishes. There's the ridiculous, chaotic desire to just pool it into his hands and put it back into Buzen's body somehow.
But repairs - or logging out in this case - are about as close to that as he can get. He reaches for Buzen's hand with less hesitation than he'd reached for his sleeve, though when his thumb slides across a small and errant streak of blood, it's like his entire body jolts into a tenseness. He takes a breath, and repeats:]
Let's go. [And then, more quietly:] I hate to see you like this.
[In the sort of tone that says you know this. He hates the sound of pain in his voice and he hates the paleness of his skin. Losing blood is such an easy way to see the life drain out of something, but when he sees it in Buzen, it's not satisfying at all.
But!! He'll offer support in any way he can as they bounce the heck out of here, because Buzen is still standing but Buzen would still be standing right up until he wholeass lost consciousness. MATSUI KNOWS HIM.]
[ . . . well. there's nothing else they can do here. buzen supposes that's fair enough. in the end, he just wanted to make sure that he caught matsui before he left him entirely - if they missed each other, that would've been bad. but maybe what he should do next time is just log out to clear the injuries, and then log back in... then matsui would never know!
even if that feels a little two duplicitous for him....
regardless, they'll go through the process of logging out - interacting with a strange menu that doesn't feel quite in touch with reality - and then finding themselves back at dodo house. buzen slips off the headset and given that he probably entered with matsui, they're still pretty close to each other.
and there he is - entirely repaired. not a single ache or splash of red to be found. he pats himself down just in case before sighing.]
I mean, it's even faster than repairs... [but once he's done mumbling to himself, he'll reach out to catch matsui's hand pretty soon after, so that as soon as he's logged out, he can already feel buzen next to him.
[Buzen the golden retriever deciding not to sneak his injuries away because it's Too Sneaky... Truly sasuga Buzen.
In any case, he's grateful for it in that wordless way he often is - that he has the anchor before he even lands, a hand in his that reminds him of where he is as he logs out and reaches up to pull off his headset a little hastily. He doesn't often rush, but any time he does, it's always for Buzen.
Naturally, he's looking over toward Buzen mere seconds after he's reoriented, giving his hand a tight, reflexive-seeming squeeze. True enough, not a scratch is left. It's faster than repairs, but similar enough that it isn't even strange. And just like when Buzen gets out of repairs, Matsui is still staring at him with that distant, quiet, sad sort of look. They're swords, and he's got no misgivings or misconceptions about it. Just, you know. Of course he hates the reminder that Buzen, too, is just as breakable as he is.]
Everything healed as it should? You don't have any lingering pain? Nothing feels amiss...?
[and he'll be as direct about it as buzen tends to be, shifting to make it more obvious that there's no red left on the fabric of his clothes. no blood to be found, of the fresh or dried variety. his free hand tugs on the hem of his shirt, lifting it as much as the cloth will allow to show the smooth, unmarred skin underneath. if i was anna or yaywon, i would write this tag to be hornier but that's really not the goal here.
but he'll left it slip out of his hand a moment later, shirt falling back against him, and just move to be closer to matsui's side. he bumps against his shoulder in a friendly little knock, expression softening.]
Nothing hurts anymore, and nothing went wrong in the repairs. I just got a little caught up during the mission. I don't want you to worry too much...
[i hate this note so much don't talk about buzen's abs or you will summon yaywon
He seems... satisfied??? to see that there isn't any trace of injury remaining, at least. As satisfied as one can be when it's clear that they're also still just in a bit of a mood in general.]
I will worry regardless.
[BINCH. Buzen barely ever has to deal with how bullheaded he can truly be, but sometimes it really does just leap to the surface. Especially in times like now, where he's being emotional and nonsensical and he knows it, but still feels like digging in his heels.]
...But it's good that the repairs work so cleanly. Someone else was able to tend to you there, as well?
[Buzen hadn't looked great, but it at least looked like someone did something to patch him up as well as possible.]
[did i tell you that yaywon found this thread and i was like 'what the fuck'
anyway buzen just nods at that! his hand comes up to his face to scratch idly at his cheek, as if trying to think of a way to pull matsui out of his funk....]
Yeah! I was able to find a friend at the Mender's Guild who was willing to look at my injuries - I'm really grateful.
[ - well, no immediate ideas are coming so he'll just throw his arm around matsui's shoulders! his fingers lightly tussle the ends of his hair, like he's trying to get his attention on anything besides buzen's mortality]
[HELP NOT YAYWON. BLASTS HER WITH MY SIX FISH BEAM
This is so funny though EVEN WHEN BUZEN IS THE ONE SHREDDED TO BITS HE'S STILL HAVING TO PULL MATSUI OUT OF THE DEPRESSION MINES. At least Matsui understands how ridiculous it is, and he gives Buzen a bit of a sullen look even while he's being spoiled by this cute hair tussling.]
That is not a question for me.
[He's not the one who needs help!! Or, more specifically, this isn't the sort of thing that can be helped. It's just The Way. They're swords, so they get hurt. Matsui loves Buzen, so he'll be unhappy when he's injured, even if he returns to a good-as-new state soon enough.
He'll reach for the hand at his hair, though, so he can give his fingers a gentle squeeze.]
...I would like to go to the room.
[do they even still live together at this point I THINK THEY DO IT'S FINE]
[I ACTUALLY DON'T THINK THEY DO HELP but it doesn't matter to buzen, because he'll just go to wherever matsui is. when matsui squeezes his fingers, buzen will just let theirs tangle together, making it harder for him to pull away or let go.]
Mm... alright, let's go.
[easily. with the arm around matsui's shoulders, he'll just go to start walking in that direction then, encouraging him to lean a little bit more on buzen to see if the closeness will help]
How about if I carry you and run there? So you can see for yourself all my strength's back and I'm good as new.
[this is such a stupid test but also it's the most straightforward one, so of course it's what buzen suggests]
[HELP this just becomes a wistful statement from matsui pining over the better days before dodo became his mortal enemy.
He seems fine enough with this arrangement, though; he doesn't have any particularly strong desire to let go of Buzen's hand, even if he's in a bit of a mood. The suggestion, likewise, has him glancing over. Something so ridiculously and perfectly Buzen... He can't help but feel fond, the warmth of it striking through his moody malaise at least a little.]
You don't need to show me. I know that it is.
[But he still stops walking anyway, shifting to face Buzen like he expects to be scooped up regardless.]
[matsui please acknowledge that it's a stupid suggestion.... even though buzen just think it's as close to logical as he'll ever get! so when matsui stops walking, so does he. a smile pulls at his lips, sincere and eager, apparently pleased that his stupid idea sounds good to matsui too]
Is this what they call a mixed signal, Matsu...
[when his words don't match his actions - but well, actions really do speak louder, right? so buzen will follow exactly that lead, scooping matsui up in his arms so easily and holding him close]
You can listen to my heartbeat too - my uh, blood's probably working hard?
[No........ It's not a stupid suggestion because it means he gets to be spoiled and carried by Buzen... He's WINNING!!
Also this is so funny HELP. Buzen really does try so hard IT'S THE EARNESTNESS FOR HIM!! He closes his eyes and rests his head against Buzen's chest, right over his heart, and there's maybe even the faintest and briefest flicker of smiles because truly, it is so ridiculous.
But hearing it does set his own heart at ease, just a little.]
...Yes. I can hear it - your blood is working hard, as usual.
[These are such fucking weird words but they are so soft coming from him.]
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they'd gotten into such a habit of handholding, and he's not sure if it'll work to soothe matsui as much here - but he hopes he can try?]
Okay. I'm okay, Matsu. You don't need to worry so much.
[though that's probably also buzen's tendency to say things boldly, decisively. there's a slightly breathless quality the longer he speaks, as if doing so through pain, and even now the blood loss has led to him being slightly more pale....
but he's standing, so surely it's not a big deal.]
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But repairs - or logging out in this case - are about as close to that as he can get. He reaches for Buzen's hand with less hesitation than he'd reached for his sleeve, though when his thumb slides across a small and errant streak of blood, it's like his entire body jolts into a tenseness. He takes a breath, and repeats:]
Let's go. [And then, more quietly:] I hate to see you like this.
[In the sort of tone that says you know this. He hates the sound of pain in his voice and he hates the paleness of his skin. Losing blood is such an easy way to see the life drain out of something, but when he sees it in Buzen, it's not satisfying at all.
But!! He'll offer support in any way he can as they bounce the heck out of here, because Buzen is still standing but Buzen would still be standing right up until he wholeass lost consciousness. MATSUI KNOWS HIM.]
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even if that feels a little two duplicitous for him....
regardless, they'll go through the process of logging out - interacting with a strange menu that doesn't feel quite in touch with reality - and then finding themselves back at dodo house. buzen slips off the headset and given that he probably entered with matsui, they're still pretty close to each other.
and there he is - entirely repaired. not a single ache or splash of red to be found. he pats himself down just in case before sighing.]
I mean, it's even faster than repairs... [but once he's done mumbling to himself, he'll reach out to catch matsui's hand pretty soon after, so that as soon as he's logged out, he can already feel buzen next to him.
is that better?]
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In any case, he's grateful for it in that wordless way he often is - that he has the anchor before he even lands, a hand in his that reminds him of where he is as he logs out and reaches up to pull off his headset a little hastily. He doesn't often rush, but any time he does, it's always for Buzen.
Naturally, he's looking over toward Buzen mere seconds after he's reoriented, giving his hand a tight, reflexive-seeming squeeze. True enough, not a scratch is left. It's faster than repairs, but similar enough that it isn't even strange. And just like when Buzen gets out of repairs, Matsui is still staring at him with that distant, quiet, sad sort of look. They're swords, and he's got no misgivings or misconceptions about it. Just, you know. Of course he hates the reminder that Buzen, too, is just as breakable as he is.]
Everything healed as it should? You don't have any lingering pain? Nothing feels amiss...?
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[and he'll be as direct about it as buzen tends to be, shifting to make it more obvious that there's no red left on the fabric of his clothes. no blood to be found, of the fresh or dried variety. his free hand tugs on the hem of his shirt, lifting it as much as the cloth will allow to show the smooth, unmarred skin underneath. if i was anna or yaywon, i would write this tag to be hornier but that's really not the goal here.
but he'll left it slip out of his hand a moment later, shirt falling back against him, and just move to be closer to matsui's side. he bumps against his shoulder in a friendly little knock, expression softening.]
Nothing hurts anymore, and nothing went wrong in the repairs. I just got a little caught up during the mission. I don't want you to worry too much...
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He seems... satisfied??? to see that there isn't any trace of injury remaining, at least. As satisfied as one can be when it's clear that they're also still just in a bit of a mood in general.]
I will worry regardless.
[BINCH. Buzen barely ever has to deal with how bullheaded he can truly be, but sometimes it really does just leap to the surface. Especially in times like now, where he's being emotional and nonsensical and he knows it, but still feels like digging in his heels.]
...But it's good that the repairs work so cleanly. Someone else was able to tend to you there, as well?
[Buzen hadn't looked great, but it at least looked like someone did something to patch him up as well as possible.]
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anyway buzen just nods at that! his hand comes up to his face to scratch idly at his cheek, as if trying to think of a way to pull matsui out of his funk....]
Yeah! I was able to find a friend at the Mender's Guild who was willing to look at my injuries - I'm really grateful.
[ - well, no immediate ideas are coming so he'll just throw his arm around matsui's shoulders! his fingers lightly tussle the ends of his hair, like he's trying to get his attention on anything besides buzen's mortality]
... c'mon, Matsu. What can I do? To help?
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This is so funny though EVEN WHEN BUZEN IS THE ONE SHREDDED TO BITS HE'S STILL HAVING TO PULL MATSUI OUT OF THE DEPRESSION MINES. At least Matsui understands how ridiculous it is, and he gives Buzen a bit of a sullen look even while he's being spoiled by this cute hair tussling.]
That is not a question for me.
[He's not the one who needs help!! Or, more specifically, this isn't the sort of thing that can be helped. It's just The Way. They're swords, so they get hurt. Matsui loves Buzen, so he'll be unhappy when he's injured, even if he returns to a good-as-new state soon enough.
He'll reach for the hand at his hair, though, so he can give his fingers a gentle squeeze.]
...I would like to go to the room.
[do they even still live together at this point I THINK THEY DO IT'S FINE]
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Mm... alright, let's go.
[easily. with the arm around matsui's shoulders, he'll just go to start walking in that direction then, encouraging him to lean a little bit more on buzen to see if the closeness will help]
How about if I carry you and run there? So you can see for yourself all my strength's back and I'm good as new.
[this is such a stupid test but also it's the most straightforward one, so of course it's what buzen suggests]
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He seems fine enough with this arrangement, though; he doesn't have any particularly strong desire to let go of Buzen's hand, even if he's in a bit of a mood. The suggestion, likewise, has him glancing over. Something so ridiculously and perfectly Buzen... He can't help but feel fond, the warmth of it striking through his moody malaise at least a little.]
You don't need to show me. I know that it is.
[But he still stops walking anyway, shifting to face Buzen like he expects to be scooped up regardless.]
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Is this what they call a mixed signal, Matsu...
[when his words don't match his actions - but well, actions really do speak louder, right? so buzen will follow exactly that lead, scooping matsui up in his arms so easily and holding him close]
You can listen to my heartbeat too - my uh, blood's probably working hard?
[maybe/????? hE'S CLEARLY TRYING SO HARD]
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Also this is so funny HELP. Buzen really does try so hard IT'S THE EARNESTNESS FOR HIM!! He closes his eyes and rests his head against Buzen's chest, right over his heart, and there's maybe even the faintest and briefest flicker of smiles because truly, it is so ridiculous.
But hearing it does set his own heart at ease, just a little.]
...Yes. I can hear it - your blood is working hard, as usual.
[These are such fucking weird words but they are so soft coming from him.]