[he's been through too much traumatic stuff to disagree,
and yet,]
... but you're all pretty amazing, you know? Like - how you enjoy music. Some songs last through the generations and are probably even older than me. That's amazing. That's not something that can be created without humans.
The same goes for art and poetry, even castles and history... How can I not be amazed at something like that?
You strike me as the kind of person who only thinks about something when it's in front of you. [ a pause. ] But I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing.
I guess... we aren't all bad. Sometimes it's hard to think about that, with everything else going on.
Fuhaha, a lot of the time, I do think I'm like that. But... I don't know. Having emotions for the first time - there's a lot to think about. Even if I'm not good at thinking, I want to at least give it a shot.
[just to have enough respect for everything and everyone he's met so far.]
But... it doesn't take away from whatever is happening to you in the moment. [just patting kazuki's shoulder] If someone's being a jerk, no way you're gonna have time to go 'dang, humans are great'. Even I couldn't.
For the first time...? [ oh no. ] It's hard enough for us, and we have to deal with that our whole lives. Most people don't think about it at all, so... it's good that you're trying?
[ though how a spirit handles it must be different, huh. maybe it's easier to think objectively, when you maybe didn't have to deal with it before? wondering about it kind of makes his head hurt. ]
...Still. If we are all dead, it makes sense to be upset. I'd think even a sword tsukumogami would feel the same way.
[ versus whatever buzen is feeling, this golden retriever of a spirit ]
It's amazing to me that you have emotions like this all the time... If anything, it just gives me one more reason to be impressed by humans.
[you all just have hearts and live like this??? dang]
Mm.... I guess I'm a little disappointed - there's no one out there that wouldn't wish for more time, right? But... I'm also not surprised, I guess. I always expected to be broken or to disappear eventually.
[which he says like he's aware it's not healthy for humans, but for a sword it just makes sense?]
I don't know if that's something to be impressed about... some of us really don't handle it well, you know?
[ even kazuki has a temper that he struggles to keep in check. now that he thinks about it, he wonders if not having emotions at all would be better sometimes. ]
It didn't really surprise me, either. People die all the time. [ pause. ] The game thing is new.
[ part of him wants to point out that not everyone does learn or grow, but it's probably best not to argue those kinds of things with a sword, let alone one that's so determined to see the good in humanity. kazuki will let it be. ]
You're not the only one who wants to change it, though. Maybe with all of you here, you can figure out something to do about it.
[ not going to get his hopes up for it, but at least it's something for them to work towards - besides simply playing the game to win. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ who doesn't watch movies ]
No problem... [ this is such a weird conversation. ] You're doing surprisingly well with all this.
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I guess you could say I'm pretty used to being in weird situations. Maybe it's made me adaptable?
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[ but sure, okay. ]
Don't tell me you've been in a situation like this before.
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Not exactly but it's more like...
When you're created as a weapon, it's not like death's a stranger either.
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...When you're what?
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[he gestures at himself]
Are you familiar with the concept of tsukumogami, Hoshi-san? I dunno how common the tale is in the modern era...
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I've heard of it. Are you saying you're one?
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Yup, you got it.
Phew, that's way easier when someone already knows what I'm talking about...
[he's had to explain so much,]
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Buzen Gou, a work of Gou no Yoshihiro.
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Most people haven't met us - so it's nice to get to meet you too!! In the end, I really do like being with humans a lot.
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[he's been through too much traumatic stuff to disagree,
and yet,]
... but you're all pretty amazing, you know? Like - how you enjoy music. Some songs last through the generations and are probably even older than me. That's amazing. That's not something that can be created without humans.
The same goes for art and poetry, even castles and history... How can I not be amazed at something like that?
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[ kazuki is just an eighteen year old kid who takes those things for granted. ]
You didn't strike me as the type to pay attention to things like that, Buzen-san.
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Even if I'm not good at thinking it all through - I've learned a lot from talking to humans, even if I don't get to stay with them very long.
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I guess... we aren't all bad. Sometimes it's hard to think about that, with everything else going on.
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[just to have enough respect for everything and everyone he's met so far.]
But... it doesn't take away from whatever is happening to you in the moment. [just patting kazuki's shoulder] If someone's being a jerk, no way you're gonna have time to go 'dang, humans are great'. Even I couldn't.
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[ though how a spirit handles it must be different, huh. maybe it's easier to think objectively, when you maybe didn't have to deal with it before? wondering about it kind of makes his head hurt. ]
...Still. If we are all dead, it makes sense to be upset. I'd think even a sword tsukumogami would feel the same way.
[ versus whatever buzen is feeling, this golden retriever of a spirit ]
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[you all just have hearts and live like this??? dang]
Mm.... I guess I'm a little disappointed - there's no one out there that wouldn't wish for more time, right? But... I'm also not surprised, I guess. I always expected to be broken or to disappear eventually.
[which he says like he's aware it's not healthy for humans, but for a sword it just makes sense?]
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[ even kazuki has a temper that he struggles to keep in check. now that he thinks about it, he wonders if not having emotions at all would be better sometimes. ]
It didn't really surprise me, either. People die all the time. [ pause. ] The game thing is new.
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[and it's something that he loves about them, compared to swords and history which always feel so stagnant]
The game thing is new... and it makes me a little mad, but it doesn't feel like much I can change for right now.
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You're not the only one who wants to change it, though. Maybe with all of you here, you can figure out something to do about it.
[ not going to get his hopes up for it, but at least it's something for them to work towards - besides simply playing the game to win. ]