It'd be easier to kill someone, I think. Obviously I don't want to lose anyone else on my team, but if I knew it was us, and we were looking at someone else taking the fall for it...
Maybe I'd make it through that for the sake of living. I've already done a lot that I'm not proud of. But I think between taking someone's life myself and watching someone die because of me, the latter would be harder, so... at the very least, whoever they picked, I'd want to be the one to erase them.
I'd sooner break myself. [okay, extremist] I guess if I really had to, you're right. I'd sooner Erase someone else than watch someone take the fall for me.
[ . . . ]
I've seen that happen before, when the person most responsible gets to live. It makes me pretty mad.
[buzen thinks about it - and tries to not get lost in the memory]
He tricked a lot of people. He made them believe in salvation. He gave them weapons, and tried to get them to rebel against the government - so that even if they died, then at least they would find paradise. But then he sold them out—to the same government he told them to fight, because he realized they weren't going to win.
And yet he lived, while every single person that he tricked died, including women and children.
I think.... that's some of the worst of humanity I've seen.
...that's more or less what I would've expected out of most people, you know? To prioritize their own survival, and do whatever they needed to do for their own ends. That's how the world usually works, and how people have to think in order to live. If it happened in the City, they'd have sold him out too.
[if it happened in the city-- well. the first question would have to be 'did you make a contract with him, that stipulated the way the rebellion would be handled? if not, then too bad.']
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[just making a little 'c'mere' gesture, if he wants to sit.]
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but also buzen is still just radiating a faint aura of anger]
One of the rules is trial can't be easy - and I kept worrying that I was toeing the line of it. [he was arguing SO HARD for people to vote for bdsm]
... but then they started looking at you, and your team, and I couldn't take it.
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[instead of looking more sus by arguing at the very mention of potential involvement. that had to wait until they actually got called out directly.]
I'd have argued harder if they pushed it.
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shakes his head at that more furiously]
People are just doing their best. I know that too. But... there's some things that are hard for me to take.
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[they really
deserved the truth]
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[he exhales a little sigh, and just leans on buzen as usual.]
Anyone telling them, or are they just going to find out tomorrow?
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... if they don't get it tonight, then they'll find out who tomorrow.
And then I can tell everyone the rest - whatever they want to know.
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[he's just settling in.]
I'm going to stay for it.
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... I'm sure everyone wants to know. But it still feels like... some things aren't mine to say.
At least for now.
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[so he's not really going to bother asking much.]
... I think I said before that I didn't know what I would do. I still can't be sure, but... I might do the same as you, in your position.
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.... I'd get it if you don't. I like you. I like Yuzu-san. I'm not as close to Zel-san, but she seems nice too.
I don't want to act like I expect everyone to do what I did, if they knew.
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Maybe I'd make it through that for the sake of living. I've already done a lot that I'm not proud of. But I think between taking someone's life myself and watching someone die because of me, the latter would be harder, so... at the very least, whoever they picked, I'd want to be the one to erase them.
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I'd sooner break myself. [okay, extremist] I guess if I really had to, you're right. I'd sooner Erase someone else than watch someone take the fall for me.
[ . . . ]
I've seen that happen before, when the person most responsible gets to live. It makes me pretty mad.
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... what happened?
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He tricked a lot of people. He made them believe in salvation. He gave them weapons, and tried to get them to rebel against the government - so that even if they died, then at least they would find paradise. But then he sold them out—to the same government he told them to fight, because he realized they weren't going to win.
And yet he lived, while every single person that he tricked died, including women and children.
I think.... that's some of the worst of humanity I've seen.
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[if it happened in the city-- well. the first question would have to be 'did you make a contract with him, that stipulated the way the rebellion would be handled? if not, then too bad.']