Felt a lot like you're the only one he'd want to, man, I was around you both that week.
[but he definitely says it fondly, because it was still nice... he's still happy they're here with each other, difficult as the game is.
after a few seconds, though-]
It wouldn't... bother you, if someone else did want to?
[not that i wouldn't want to with you, either, but i don't know if he'd believe me to begin with, i wouldn't want him to feel like an afterthought or anything...
look he's spent just enough time around matsui to feel like if he came second he might never believe it wasn't just for buzen's sake or something, and also he just thinks maybe this depressed fucking sword could stand to be put first anyway.]
[buzen literally doesn't have a single jealous bone in his body. he also doesn't have much concept of how much matsui likes him though so it is a pretty dangerous game to play.
he found the champagne though!! he turns around to face netzach and tilts his head]
[buzen nods - and pops the champagne!! wow! what timing!
but he'll go to fill up two glasses then]
It makes enough sense to me. I love Matsu too - and even though he doesn't always agree, I think he's really easy to love.
I'm glad you're willing to admit it, though. Since last time we talked, you didn't want to.... Regardless of how things go, I think it's a sweet connection.
So I'll just wish you luck, whatever you decide to do.
It's still difficult, if I'm being honest. It still feels like the best answer is to just-- do nothing, and be satisfied with everyone's company while we have it. But I think...
...when we talked the night after the trial, and I said I'd miss him, he felt guilty about the thought that anyone would be upset he was gone. I promised I'd remember him in better ways-- that I'd think about things like when we all made flower crowns together, not about how sad the situation was.
So I think more than I'm worried about it being a bad idea, I just... I want him to know he's cared for, if he'll hear it.
[buzen is quiet at that, sipping on his champagne glass. his thoughts briefly do his speaking for him sounds like matsu
he is unsurprised, even if he is so, so loving]
... I think you'll catch him off-guard, but I also don't think that's a bad thing. I think Matsu doesn't expect to be loved, even if he's more than deserving of it.
I can't tell you how it'll go or anything - there's things about him that even I don't really get... but I hope you're able to say what you want.
He's attached to me because I'm the only Gou here.
[which he doesn't seem bothered by and he follows it with a shrug]
We already know that just loving one person won't work out for us - there's people waiting for us back home. But... I think if the heart feels something, it's always worth exploring.
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Depends on what you mean by it.
There's not all that much stuff I do with Matsu that I wouldn't do with someone else if they wanted to...
[but they made it to a bar!! hell yea this is for you netzach]
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[he was around them during emotionshare
netzach absolutely perks up when they reach the bar, though.]
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[he's so stupid, netzach,
but he'll walk back to the bar and then go to grab two glasses]
Want anything in particular?
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[DOES IT he doesn't know.]
Break out the champagne if they've got any.
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[he'll go to look at the different bottles and try to find the champagne, but as he's doing that - ]
I guess we're together romantically...? Rin talks about that sometimes. Matsu and I kiss and stuff, if that's what you mean.
But it's not like that something has to only be between us.... Matsu can kiss whoever he wants as far as I care.
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[but he definitely says it fondly, because it was still nice... he's still happy they're here with each other, difficult as the game is.
after a few seconds, though-]
It wouldn't... bother you, if someone else did want to?
[not that i wouldn't want to with you, either, but i don't know if he'd believe me to begin with, i wouldn't want him to feel like an afterthought or anything...
look he's spent just enough time around matsui to feel like if he came second he might never believe it wasn't just for buzen's sake or something, and also he just thinks maybe this depressed fucking sword could stand to be put first anyway.]
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[buzen literally doesn't have a single jealous bone in his body. he also doesn't have much concept of how much matsui likes him though so it is a pretty dangerous game to play.
he found the champagne though!! he turns around to face netzach and tilts his head]
Oh - you like Matsu in a romance way, Netz-san?
[IT JUST CLICKED]
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[sometimes you have a feeling for more than one sword actually but listen this is progress
he just doesn't know if it's a good idea to admit to it, or... do anything about it at all, considering. they don't know how this all ends yet.]
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but he'll go to fill up two glasses then]
It makes enough sense to me. I love Matsu too - and even though he doesn't always agree, I think he's really easy to love.
I'm glad you're willing to admit it, though. Since last time we talked, you didn't want to.... Regardless of how things go, I think it's a sweet connection.
So I'll just wish you luck, whatever you decide to do.
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[he didn't even realize until after the swords were both dead
he's taking his glass and taking a quick drink because now he needs it more than he previously did.]
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[his eq is good but not that good in terms of romance it's too foreign]
I just meant when we talked about the last time you had feelings for someone and didn't say anything...
I'm glad that you're willing to say something now, is all.
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[for a few seconds, he's quiet.]
It's still difficult, if I'm being honest. It still feels like the best answer is to just-- do nothing, and be satisfied with everyone's company while we have it. But I think...
...when we talked the night after the trial, and I said I'd miss him, he felt guilty about the thought that anyone would be upset he was gone. I promised I'd remember him in better ways-- that I'd think about things like when we all made flower crowns together, not about how sad the situation was.
So I think more than I'm worried about it being a bad idea, I just... I want him to know he's cared for, if he'll hear it.
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he is unsurprised, even if he is so, so loving]
... I think you'll catch him off-guard, but I also don't think that's a bad thing. I think Matsu doesn't expect to be loved, even if he's more than deserving of it.
I can't tell you how it'll go or anything - there's things about him that even I don't really get... but I hope you're able to say what you want.
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[it is fully possible that there is only room in this depressed lil sword heart for buzen. he anticipates this, tbh.]
But you're still right that he's deserving of it either way.
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[which he doesn't seem bothered by and he follows it with a shrug]
We already know that just loving one person won't work out for us - there's people waiting for us back home. But... I think if the heart feels something, it's always worth exploring.
That's just me, though.