hasteful | u know what? ok. i trust netzach

... just having met you helps, you know? I knew before ending up here that I wanted to live, but not exactly what I wanted out of it. I haven't really been part of the world in... a long time.

But being around people like you has been-- it makes it easier to figure things out. To know what to hope for.

[there's definite fondness, in the emotions that bleed through. warmth. maybe something a little like longing, especially knowing this will all probably come to an end soon.]

[buzen's smile is slow, but it's sincere. it's a little uncertain at the edges, but the core of is strong. his emotions resonate similarly. even if he doesn't think that he personally makes a difference, he is nonetheless happy.]

I'm happy to have been a part of your life, Netz-san. If these moments could give you something to hope for, something to make the rough journey of it easier then... I'm glad.

I feel similarly. It's for moments like these, the people that I get to meet, the ones waiting for me... that make it feel like I'm allowed to exist.

So I do treasure these moments. I'm glad you do, too.

Of course I do. I didn't really expect to end up meeting anyone who could really... I sort of thought no one here would get it.

...I wanted to talk to you guys pretty often, when you were gone.

[kept finding himself thinking he wished that he could. that they were still there.]

Ah... I'm sorry we ended up leaving so soon. [but he feels like they've already talked about it, and buzen thinks it's wild how every single week his erasure keeps getting brought up]

Neither of us meant to leave you...

You don't have anything to apologize for, man. I know you didn't. I just mean...

[this is why i don't have one of the writing focused floors of the library. it takes him a second to figure out the words.]

I didn't really realize until after then just how much that meant. I'm sure I said it was a relief to be able to talk to you about things others don't really get, but...

[he's not sure he really had the time to say enough. they were still important to him, he means.]

Ah...

[it's not something buzen immediately relates to - not when swords and gous are pretty much the main people he interacts with, but he can guess how much it means for netzach. to have a little glimmer of a normal life alongside those who understand, without having to worry about the details or the gaps.]

... well, we're here now, right?

[in the end, buzen is a simpleton]

For however much time we get - I'd like to not leave any more of those regrets behind. Now that we've gotten to know what it looks like without... I'm more grateful to be able to get more time with you at all.

I'm not a person who really expects to see people again - especially if they're friends.

-yeah. It's usually the same for me, too.

[the only new people he'd met before coming here were ones he had to fight. to kill. there's no making friends in that situation, really, but he definitely doesn't expect to see any of those people again.]

While we're here-- I want to make the best of the time we have left, whether we end up getting more of it or not.