[she just brushes past the curse part because she doesn't want to talk about it so much, but - she thinks about that. everybody deserves to exist. she likes that sentiment, but she worries it isn't practical, here. and she thinks... she has to be practical.
shenhe glances back to him.]
I don't think it's selfish. It's kind. [she says, quietly.] I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, either.
[she tilts her head to the side, looking conflicted.] Have you decided your team?
[he smiles at that, clearly touched, and says so easily - ] As long as you remember me, even a little, then that's all I need.
[which maybe doesn't answer much but... it's what he believes.
but to answer her question - ]
To be honest with you, me and Matsu kinda come as a set. He's really great - but he needs a little more time to get to know people than I do, so I'm mostly letting him pick who we end up on a team with. [buzen would say yes to anyone and also forget that a team can be 4 people max, can you imagine what a pain in the ass he'd be,]
[she is very good at remembering, even the worst of things. she rests her hand on her chest, thinking as she looks out towards the city.]
I like him. He offered to help me without asking for anything in return. [and boy does she know about how sometimes you need a little more time to get to know people. but:]
... I have not chosen. I've been asked a few times, but I've declined each offer. [...] However, there is one person that I think I would like to protect.
[she wrinkles her nose, but she also doesn't try to dodge him! popular, she thinks, but what she actually thinks is that just she is strong, and people would be stupid not to ask her to be on their team? please, your ego.]
Have you spoken to Nahri? [her voice gets like, a whole lot gentler.]
... I think that I would like to be. [Friends is the biggest bond that she's ever had - for her, it'd be like asking a stranger to be like... the godfather of your child or something, it's a huge step. but it was so easy with the traveler, so maybe it can be easy here, too.]
[that makes him smile, a little natural and fond thing]
Then I think there's a good chance she'd like to be, too. Making connections is a great chance, right? I'm not used to it either, so I get that it can feel like a big deal.
[even if buzen automatically assumes everyone's his friend, so it probably looks different on him, he still cherishes the opportunity.]
I think you should ask her. She'd be happy to know you're thinking of her so warmly, I bet.
but he just tilts his head, looking a little amused afterward as he settles into a more serious answer.]
Mm... Well, I only kill when I have to in general—so if someone attacks me, I'm also not just gonna take it. If someone's a danger to others, that's important to me to stop them too.
But... I know how badly people want to exist. I get it. So I don't want to take that chance from anybody that way... though I guess I also can't be super mad if someone tries to erase me for that reason either.
[she's a little relieved that he didn't go on the defensive, if only because she figures a lot of people might. she tilts her head back.]
I don't feel strongly about my second chance. I doubt it will be necessary for me to erase anybody on my own behalf. [...] I would like to spend more days with you too, Buzen.
[ah - well, if she didn't step away last time then this time he'll actually complete the motion. lightly bumping into her side as they walk along, before pulling back.]
Then let's take every moment we can get!
To be honest, I've been thinking a little similarly... I have people I want to see again but - I dunno. When I've been around for eight hundred years, and even then I might get erased in the end of everything anyway... it feels weird trying to win over other people - humans that haven't even had two decades.
But I feel like I owe it to the people who want to see me again to at least try.
[she allows it! it startles her a little, but she doesn't instinctively slap him away or anything. she doesn't quite know how to reciprocate, which is why she just like. taps his shoulder gently. yes.]
You do. [...] Matsui would be upset if you were gone entirely.
[she just dodges around having to talk about herself, though.]
I was only just starting to. [experience the human world, she means. maybe she is a little sad about that, but... she's conscious here. so at least she has that.]
Liyue. I had lived most of my life in the mountains, away from humans. [girl you are also human don't refer to them like that] I made a friend, and because of her, I felt...
Yes. [there isn't much hesitation here. she glances at him.] ... I am limited in what I can feel, but what I can, I hold onto. I would choose this every time.
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shenhe glances back to him.]
I don't think it's selfish. It's kind. [she says, quietly.] I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, either.
[she tilts her head to the side, looking conflicted.] Have you decided your team?
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[which maybe doesn't answer much but... it's what he believes.
but to answer her question - ]
To be honest with you, me and Matsu kinda come as a set. He's really great - but he needs a little more time to get to know people than I do, so I'm mostly letting him pick who we end up on a team with. [buzen would say yes to anyone and also forget that a team can be 4 people max, can you imagine what a pain in the ass he'd be,]
How about you?
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[she is very good at remembering, even the worst of things. she rests her hand on her chest, thinking as she looks out towards the city.]
I like him. He offered to help me without asking for anything in return. [and boy does she know about how sometimes you need a little more time to get to know people. but:]
... I have not chosen. I've been asked a few times, but I've declined each offer. [...] However, there is one person that I think I would like to protect.
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[he makes a move like he's about to step closer to lightly bump into her - before he actually catches himself and keeps walking instead.]
Can't say I don't get that, though. Who's your person?
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Have you spoken to Nahri? [her voice gets like, a whole lot gentler.]
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Not yet, I don't think... [which he sounds a little surprised about, but there really are so many people here,] Are you friends?
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... I think that I would like to be. [Friends is the biggest bond that she's ever had - for her, it'd be like asking a stranger to be like... the godfather of your child or something, it's a huge step. but it was so easy with the traveler, so maybe it can be easy here, too.]
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Then I think there's a good chance she'd like to be, too. Making connections is a great chance, right? I'm not used to it either, so I get that it can feel like a big deal.
[even if buzen automatically assumes everyone's his friend, so it probably looks different on him, he still cherishes the opportunity.]
I think you should ask her. She'd be happy to know you're thinking of her so warmly, I bet.
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Perhaps I will. [she glances at him.] May I ask you a question in return?
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Of course!
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[damn that answer came so fast
but he just tilts his head, looking a little amused afterward as he settles into a more serious answer.]
Mm... Well, I only kill when I have to in general—so if someone attacks me, I'm also not just gonna take it. If someone's a danger to others, that's important to me to stop them too.
But... I know how badly people want to exist. I get it. So I don't want to take that chance from anybody that way... though I guess I also can't be super mad if someone tries to erase me for that reason either.
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Would you stop me, if I tried? [this sounds like a threat but like, she's mostly just curious.]
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[at the very least, buzen didn't hear it as a threat? though now he sounds curious too]
But I wouldn't try to erase you back. I like you, Shen-san. I'd want more days to hang out with you than less.
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I don't feel strongly about my second chance. I doubt it will be necessary for me to erase anybody on my own behalf. [...] I would like to spend more days with you too, Buzen.
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Then let's take every moment we can get!
To be honest, I've been thinking a little similarly... I have people I want to see again but - I dunno. When I've been around for eight hundred years, and even then I might get erased in the end of everything anyway... it feels weird trying to win over other people - humans that haven't even had two decades.
But I feel like I owe it to the people who want to see me again to at least try.
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You do. [...] Matsui would be upset if you were gone entirely.
[she just dodges around having to talk about herself, though.]
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help
this is so funny. he tilts his head a little in confusion before he also gives her a shoulder tap in return? nice. yes. good. human interaction.]
.... well, it's a little complicated for us.
[said with a little shrug,] But even if we get another seven weeks here, that's still something, right?
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It is. [she tucks her hair behind her ear.] I will see you through the seven weeks, team or no team.
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Hopefully we can find even more missions to accomplish in that time, even if we gotta self-assign them.
I feel like I didn't get to experience as much of the modern human world as I would've liked, so might as well take advantage of the opportunity.
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Yeah? Where were you before?
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[a pause.]
I felt.
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but he listens and - smiles a little, at the repetition]
... Emotions are interesting, huh? I'm still getting used to mine, too.
But I think... I'd rather choose this, than not having them. What do you think?
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Yes. [there isn't much hesitation here. she glances at him.] ... I am limited in what I can feel, but what I can, I hold onto. I would choose this every time.
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